Hi. I am 36 years old and have never grown up. I am a total fuck up and have always had a lust for danger and excitement but it has always got me in trouble. My love for dangerous men and drugs endangers me but I can never get enough of either, and my 'precious heart' is always bleeding from the loves of my life killing me.
I wear my heart on my sleeve and rely on the kindness of strangers. Yes, I shag men for money and drugs but still love and crave affection from the men who share my life, fuck ups like me. My current man is a cokehead like me and has been a scumbag lately but I still long for him. I live in fear of him coming to a bad end due to his lust for danger and association with crime and violence. I give him what I am and we share our snow.
I am an intellectual, writer and musician as well as a drug addict and a sex worker. Why I do this and continue at my age......don't ask as I am constantly asking myself. I have been addicted to drugs (not only coke) for half my life due to all my undiagnosed issues, besides the fact I just like to get high
Welcome to my fucked up world and be ready for some rants!
Time will be disjointed as it will be memoirs from different moments from this madness.
Sniff to this and more soon......
4 years ago